Democracy doesn't work

Drat and egad! Sometimes I don't know what the devil my plutocrats are doing, and why they tarry and fail to take prompt action and properly drug the food supply of the masses once and for all! Now I know some will always call for the elimination of the pauper once and for all, but I dare say until the servant robot has been perfected we must keep an ample supply of unwashed little people around so my tennis togs can be properly scrubbed and the impoverished harlot will bear no qualms about cleaning my nether regions with various orifice.

Latin is a lovely language is it not? Even on dark days a wry smile will cross my face sometimes when I think of those swarthy Romans and the lofty lingua they perfected oh so many centuries ago. But then of course I am overwhelmed with sadness when I think of how we better people, we rich few, let slip the reigns of untrammeled power and gave a sop to the filthy mass of idiots that make up the bulk of humanity. You see what happens when you spend each and every day cavorting on your yacht with a bronzed trollop, eating sweet grapes from her navel while shooting endangered fowl with a spear gun amidships.

One must take care to divert at least half a day a year to ensure the poor and powerless remain so, otherwise the catastrophe of an Obama election becomes a reality! I dare say it seems like only yesterday the ignorant inbred reprobate morons that composed most of the southern and western states of the USA could be counted on to carry the country for the elite, who could spend a moment or two appealing to their racism and general idiocy in order to garner the votes necessary to win the crown!

Of course that is the problem is it not? The President wears not a crown, why he seems never to don a chapeau at all! The loss of the haberdasher's influence was the death knell for power in the hands of the elite. A laurel never looked right on a pauper, and no impoverished scum would ever dare don a bowler hat and make a bid for the presidency when things were right with the world.

I can hear the squeals of idiot joy through my crystal windows now. Though I argued against nominating a cadaver and a bimbo my counsel went unheeded, and now the Bush years will end ignominiously! Who could have ever thought that possible?

With this calamity fresh in my mind I will divert a small portion of the fortune I amassed investing in oil 8 years ago to genetic research, and we shall see if those scientists I pay can alter the DNA so we can finally stamp out democracy, or at the very least the French, once and for all.

I dare say this century has gone far too long without a proper genocide. It will take two vials of phosphates and the full harem of my favorite whores to get me to rest tonight!